there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize