This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
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