in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
