Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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