i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
