And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
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