Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
