There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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