Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Welp...herpes.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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