it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
