If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
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