did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
