Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
