if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
