now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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