dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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