Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize