I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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