They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize
