Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
