I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
