First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
