Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
