Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
