Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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