Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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