I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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