Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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