I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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