but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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