He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
