D3 body, D1 cock
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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