whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
