My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
