I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
