Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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