I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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