this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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