Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
