Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
