I'm so fucking centered right now
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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