Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
