i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
it's great music for shaving your balls
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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