I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
