who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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