i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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