I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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