can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
