her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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