His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize