I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
