honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
false alarm, still single
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
